Monday, May 19, 2008

Top 10 Week 8 musings

Had a wonderful time this weekend watching Dynamo take down Chicago in the rain and lightning through the miracle of tele-vision. Also had more fun than I thought I would running through the videos of the other games from the over the weekend, which brought about his series of thoughts, rants and other musings, in no particular order:

1. Those ARE the droids I'm looking for. Hand 'em over.
Why do other GM's even discuss trades with Dominic Kinnear at this point? On the same night that Bobby Boswell scored the game-winner for Dynamo (followed by his Crash Davis-style slide on the rain-soaked Bridgeview surface), trade partner Zach Wells was over in the Home Depot Center turning victory into bone-crushing defeat, surrendering three goals in a nightmarish span of about 8 minutes or so. So notch one more for the Dom, as Bozzie '08 really is starting to turn into the player he was in 2006.

2. Flip....flip...flip.flip.flipflipflipflipflip.
That's the sound of the pages turning on the calendars marking the final coaching days of both Little Stevie Morrow and Tom "(sit on my) Thumb" Soehn. Footie McBlogmesiter Dan Loney titled his post on the LAG/Frisco game "Uilio Avino," meaning, as he wrote "No D in his game? No D in his name." Add one more great _P signing to Morrow's credit. Any team that gives up a hat trick to Edson Buddle (Edson Buddle!!!!!!) deserves to have their franchise revoked and sent to USL On. The. Spot.

As for Soehn, he turned it around to the tune of a Supporter's Shield last year after a slow start. But this year, I have my doubts about him being able to work that magic. As Phil Garner can attest here in Houston, you pull that slow start crap one too many times, eventually, your team just decides to say "What the hey" and do it all the time. Bye bye Tommy.

3. Don't need no special treatment to get that call. Adrian Serioux should be exiled for at least two games for that ridiculous, Paulie Walnuts-level hit on Beckham. Despite my better nature, I'm beginning to become a fan of Goldenballs and his playing partner Landon "The Enforcer" Donovan. (More Loney: "Every time I see one of those MLS human rights ads about the dignity of all people and the evils of discrimination, I expect the tag at the end to be 'I'm Landon Donovan. Mexico sucks.'") Say what you will about LAG getting all the preferential treatment, but those guys are just flat out backing it up, and if you don't respect that, then you're just holding a damn grudge.

4. Oh Canada. Oh Brother. At this point, if you haven't heard it, you haven't been listening, but Toronto is becoming an absolute beast. See what a little less Mo (Johnston that is) on the sidelines can do for you. Now if he doesn't get all trade happy, those maddening hordes may have something to really cheer about in November. The scene I'm looking for is a November snowstorm all over BMO Field for the Reds v. Revs Eastern final.

5. Edson Buddle. I just had to mention that again.

6. Picking wings off flies is way harder than this. Anyone see the NER win over San Jose? Thanks to Steve Nicol, Africa is going to become the new Argentina in MLS. Now the Quakes 3.0 get to face a surging Dynamo Thursday. I am taking nothing for granted, but, man, do the Quakes look bad. Here's Glenn Davis' take:

Having called the NE/San Jose match last night at Gillette Stadium all I can say is that I may have seen the worst MLS game of the year. Certainly it was the most passionless. Was it just one of those nights? Maybe. But when it comes to San Jose it was a less than professional performance just from the standpoint of coming to compete.
From the opening whistle it looked as though the Earthquakes did not want to be in NE.
The Revolution scored 6 minutes in through a poorly defended free kick which Kheli Dube finished and then probably the worst own goal of the season when James Riley went to head back to Joe Cannon who raced off his line. Riley put his header over Cannon and in.
The second half was a bit better from the Quakes but you could see that San Jose coach Frank Yallop was clearly upset about the lack of fight and desire.

Here, we report, you decide. James Riley, how do I put this succinctly and tenderly, you suck.

7. Whither goes Wondo? Kyle Brown the Dynamo's answer to forward pace problems? Whodathunkit? Chris Wondolowski had better hope the following get called up to the US squads this summer:


Even then, watch Wondo ride the pine. Something's going on there and no one, not Fallas, not Kinnear, not even Glenn Davis, wants to talk about it. It may just be time for Kinnear to get the Jedi mind trick battery recharged and find someone on which to dump Wondo for a future league MVP.

8. De Rosario's de noggin. So DDR gets credit for the first wackified goal that originated from Rico Clark's boot in the Fire win. And I thought the one off his face last year against Pachuca was weird.

9. Mr. White, this yellow's for you. Playtherapy has been going on about this to Mr3d and I since Chicago signed the guy last year, but this is the first time Cuauhtemoc Blanco was doing his whine/flop/whine/flop/play like a Hall of Famer/whine//flop number on my team. My reaction, fun at first, but why exactly did Paul Ward wait until the 94th minute to book the guy? Does Ward not have any professionalism at all? How do you let a player, ANY player, abuse you like that? Geeza Louisa, shut the f*ck up.

10. Edson Buddle. There's his hat trick.


playtherapy said...

No defense and cross-dressing aside (@ least I think), Blanco has the Jedi mind tricks of Denise Rodman and Schelotto also did a pretty good impersonation over the weekend. Why not? Given the joke of MLS officiating, the zebras seem almost in awe of the legends- I often wonder if they change shirts after the games to blend into the crowds so they can stand anonmyously in the autograph receiving lines next to the team buses. The League Office should do something about those who make their officials look even more chimp/chump like... Guzan playing Horton Hatches an Egg prior to goal kicks is a good example. I guess doing something about it would only accentuate how bad it's getting as a few top notch players would inevitably end up getting sent off- not what the brass wants-so we suffer the results.

I think you greatly inflate Wondo's trade value. I like him and would like to see him get more minutes though Brown adds a dimension sorely lacking. A future MVP for last year's Reserve League's Golden Boot Winner? Here in Texas, I'll see my pee freeze before it hits the ground before that happens.

Let's hope Bobby continues the upward trend. As far as Tommy- was Gomez gone and Gallardo in with the total roster shake up- more Payne and Kasper or Soehn? Either way, Soehn looks like dead man walking, his team looks lost with the ball- excepting rugged individualism and huge mental lapses (forgetting lessons learned in Man Marking 101).

Morrow is rumored to have lost control of his team and this fracture is supposedly mirrored on the field. Too bad we didn't get this served up to at Robertson- we may have survived Caig's 'gifts'.

Finally, kudo's to Lalas or @ the very least to Gullit for scaring the beejus enuff out of Alexi to get hinm to stay quiet and do little. That and Pires have worked well so far. Lat them pray no major injuries, no injuries....

playtherapy said...

Another thought- the knock on Gullit as manager was he lacked tactical nuance- and this was in England (not known as fertile soil for managerial genius)!Interestingly, he looks miles ahead of his contemporaries in the MLS. Does this reflect the state of the US's supposed best and brightest coaches?

Martek said...


I did not mean that Wondo would be the future league MBVP, only that, using Kinnear's established ability to trade a sow's ear for a silk purse, we get one for the boy. We can even throw in his brother for good measure!

Morrow is in deep do-do and good riddance to him. Though seeing Dallas underachieve like that does wonders for my sense of well-being, it's always a matter of which of our guys is going to get hurt playing against those hack-whackers. Last time it was Onstad and Robinson. Next week who?

And we'll see just how good Ruud is when Donovan and Becks are out on international duty in a week or so. Talk about cutting out a team's heart and brains and various other internal organs.

playtherapy said...

Naw, I understood what you were saying about Wondo- I was saying that Wondo's current trade value probably wouldn't get you much- especially not a diamond in the rough.

Martek said...

Of course, now that MOrrow is out in Frisco, Soehn's seat is getting hotter by the day!